Now It's Personal

Goodness gracious, somehow I am beginning my 24th year of being alive already! I feel like the older I get, the faster time goes. My birthday was actually surprisingly nice! I had been dreading it because honestly being far away from my family & basically people who cared are quite far away. But I've been so lucky to meet some people down here who cared too! It was a nice, quiet, & small birthday & I felt so special. It meant a lot especially because I've been having such a rough time lately missing home & being stressed from school & my plant isn't doing well & just being a bit lonely in general.

I guess I was feeling a bit down especially because I had been feeling like I wasn't doing much in the way of personal growth. I think this year was unique in the sense that usually, I am doing so much internal change, but this time there were so many external changes that I had trouble keeping up.

In my 23rd year

• I graduated college!


• left my longest held job


• Saw a friend of mine that I'd known since high school get married & thought, "awwwwhhh" a lot


• Briefly played softball even though I hate sports because I liked the people who were playing


• made friends with the ex


• had probably 3,000,000,000 chocolate milkshakes at Fat Jack's


• got to see for probably the last time, the free Shakespeare plays in Woodward Park


• went to a trillion parties, realized that I do, in fact, not hate parties


• visited Los Angeles to see where I would be living, ended up at Disneyland instead


• wrote wrote wrote


• tried to learn to swim again (failed, seriously someone help me!)


• watched lots of movies


• moved to Los Angeles


• got a new job (yeah I was unemployed for the whole summer, it was fun, I was poor)


• unmade friends with the ex


• dyed my hair many many many times


• made new friends


• started grad school


• briefly dated someone, got dumped before I even knew where I stood with the guy. Initially was sad, now I can't find it anything but hilarious


• began volunteering!


• was a power ranger for Halloween with new friends


• went to lots of museums


• became hooked on coffee


• did lots of work in class that was challenging/heartbreaking/fulfilling


• got my wallet stolen for the first time ever


• experienced, "the guy that randomly never called back" (rude!)


• was "the girl that randomly never called back" to someone else (more rude! I know that I know better than to behave that way)


• Disneyland again!


• saw some pretty great bands/musicians. LA has some nice venues (there, I said something nice about you, city that I am not terribly fond of)


• sort of figured out LA's public transportation system (it's kind of a disaster), also lost my bus pass kind of a lot of times


• put a hole in my ear, aggravated it with a sweater, freaked out about it being infected & cried my eyes out like a big baby, was helped out by a friend, all is well


• kept on creating!

I mean really, it was a pretty insane year for me now that I've taken the time to actually look back on it. But you know, even though I still feel like I'm playing catch up to the external changes in my life, I'm feeling pretty good about where I am right now. One of the things I am told pretty often by people I meet is, "you seem pretty independent". This makes me really happy because I think it is my number one survival skill & a quality that I like about myself. Randomly moving to a place where I didn't know anyone really has put that independence to its limits. & yes, I do get lonely a lot, I think that's normal though considering the situation. With every day that passes I am getting a tiny bit tougher (grrrrrr), smarter, stronger, and freer (is this a word? Should I retract the smarter statement?). To me, personal growth is about constantly becoming a better version of yourself & I think I grew more than I initially realized. I am so happy that everyone who was a part of my 23rd year was there, whether it was a positive or negative interaction, making it so unique & definitely a year I won't forget, even when I am a little granny.

So hello, 24th year, we are just a few days in, it's nice to meet you. I've had some pretty amazing years so you have a lot to live up to, but I have no doubt you will. You are so full of unknown possibilities & I find that incredibly exciting. Looking forward to experiencing everything you have in store!